ELAR Teacher

Posted on 8/19/12

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Good Morning,

I am beginning a new position with a new district starting
tommorrow, and I am very excited, as I believe I have
finally found my new "home". However, being fully aware of
the challenges my position holds, coupled with my own
personal deficits that I need to work on on a daily basis,
I could really use and would appreciate any and all
constructive advice from administrators such as yourselves.

1.) My biggest problem is know how to deal
with "frienemies". Heck, I've just recently learned this
concept exists! Never in my pre-teaching jobs have I
encountered someone who talked to me like they were my best
friend, just to gain my confidence, then turn around and do
all they can to sabatoge my career by speaking negatively
about me to my peers/administrators. I myself am dealing
with the morality of this concept. It's one thing to be
pleasant to those you don't care for, for the sake of
professionalism...but to feign a friendship and then betray
that friendship is beyond me. I could really use some
advice on how to detect and handle this concept in my new
job.

2.) How to "fit in" and stay under the radar...yet making
sure I do the best job I can. I am, and have always been,
an "over-achiever". I'm not as intelligent as most...as I
tell my students: "no, life is NOT fair...some of us really
do have to work harder than others". I am one of those that
really do have to work harder...and sometimes my efforts
get misconstrued by others...that old addage: "she makes us
look bad" because I bust my hump everyday. It is not my
intention to make anyone "look bad". I really don't concern
myself with the quality of another's work, only my own. As
I said, I have high expectations for myself, and I have
always busted my hump to not only meet those expectations,
but to exceed them. I've always been the kid who, if I got
a 97 on an assignment, I will beat myself up over those 3
missed points. I do not wish to change this about my work
ethics, for it is my students who benefit from it, and they
who will suffer if I resort to doing "just what is expected
of me". Yet, at the same time, I do not wish to intimidate
or frustrate any of my peers...for this creates
the "frienenemies" concept previously stated. I could
really use some advice on how to maintain my work ethics
without compromising positive peer relations.

3.) When I do need help: And I'm sure I will. I am
terrified about the moments and classes that I may not be
able to reach...I have never before been reluctant to ask
for advice or help, yet, things seem so different in the
school setting. Asking for assistance in a lesson or
classroom management seems to be the "weapon" others choose
to use to hurt my career. Yet, at the same time, I've been
told to NEVER admit a problem I have to the admin. for they
will automatically assume I am incompetent. I usually do
have decent classroom management...but there are times,
like over this past summer school session, in which I had
one class, that no matter what I did, I could not "manage"
successfully. Who to I go to for help, should this occur
again?

Anyway, thank you for your help and advice. I am really
excited about my new position, and could really use some
advice on how to manage my own behavior and thought
patterns to avoid reoccurring issues I've had in the past.

As my father once told me: "The whole world can't be wrong
and you right." Considering that these issues continue to
plague me, no matter where I go...the problem must be with
me, and not my peers/admin.

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